I’ve mentioned that my boyfriend is Chinese, right? We’re going to China later this month for two weeks to meet his family (for the first time fuuuuuuuhhhhhh) and have a look around.
TOP CONCERNS INCLUDE BUT ARE NOT LIMITED TO:
- His family doesn’t speak English. I don’t speak Chinese. This could be either excellent or terrible. The good news is that even if I put my foot in my mouth and say something weird, my boyfriend has to translate it, so he can just make me sound normal. I wish I always had a dialogue filter that efficient.
- The great firewall. I will have no Facebook, no Google, no Kakaotalk, no Instagram, no Pinterest, no YouTube. My boyfriend tells me that because Google is blocked, I won’t even have access to my gmail account. This is a real pain in my ass. Most of my unwinding time at the end of the day consists of using one or all of these apps. It also worries me that for two weeks I’ll be nearly completely cut off from my friends and family.
- Dying of lung cancer. Or hepatitis. My boyfriend keeps telling me that we can only visit Beijing for a few days because he’s really worried that the poor air quality will make me sick. Also the US government STRONGLY RECOMMENDS that I get vaccinated for Hepatitis A and TYPHOID. Ugh. Okay.
- It’s gonna be hot as hell over there. And I hate sweating. Especially because I have pretty legit body dysmorphia and the moment I feel hot, I also feel puffy, and therefore like a literal monster. Gotta go on a hardcore diet for the next two weeks y’all.
- THERE ARE TOO MANY PEOPLE IN CHINA.
We’re gonna go to Beijing, and some place called Guilin. It looks like it’s crazy beautiful there. And hopefully far enough into the country that it won’t be insanely crowded. I’ve been poking around to find some spots on the Great Wall that aren’t so crazy either. It’s a huge wall, right? Surely there are sections that are less popular. This one in Huanghuacheng looks really cool!
After the China trip, I’ll be hopping over to Seoul for a few days!! Y’all should’ve seen me work my magic on my man to set this part up. I was like “Honeyyyy I’ve been so lonely since we moved to Europe, and I don’t have any friends here, and we’ll already be so close to Seoul where I have so many friends. I can buy the plane ticket with my miles, and if I stay in the same AirBnB as last time, the owner said he’ll give me a good discount! No no, you go on back home from Beijing. I’ll just go to Korea for a few days on my own. You wouldn’t like it there anyway. Korean people are stupid and Seoul is lame.”
BOOM. Solo excursion planned. Top priority is seeing a baseball game. And drinking. And eating. I’ll keep y’all posted.